In class I had actually said that I didn’t think that the attachment styles model of adult relationships was the best. After taking the questionnaire and reading more into the attachment style I scored highly in, I changed my mind completely.
I scored a 91 in the anxious/ambivalent attachment style. Pretty high on the scale if you ask me. People with anxious/ambivalent styles typically had inconsistent or overbearing caregivers as infants. Looking back at my childhood, it hit a little too close for comfort. My mom had a lot of anger, from things I probably have no clue about. However, it was always directed towards me. With this attachment style, infants are typically anxious because of the unpredictable responses from their caregivers. I, as a child, never knew if my mom was going to be angry with me or be having a good day.
How does this affect me now? One might ask. Well. I have a lot of anxiety. This highly reflects in my love-styles scores, which I talked about last week. Highest in Eros, and Mania, or just highly anxious. I often doubt the strength of my relationships and I am always concerned that I will not be enough, or that it will be easy for someone to just stop wanting to be with me.
I guess now that I know where my insecurities are rooted, it should be easier to deal with them and not let them affect the way I live my life. Right?
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